try it and see?
I found my experience of al-anon quite mixed, although it has helped many on here tremendously. I went to al-anon to a) do something for myself and b) show my AH how serious this was for me. I also had hidden motives of wanting to find validation and support to leave him. I was at a point where I thought the only 2 options I had were to put up with him as he was or kick him to the kerb. when I got to Alanon I found a wonderful group of non-judgemental people, and a lot of support, but what I heard from them was there was a third way (note this is what I heard from there sharing not necessarily what they meant) that I could detach and learn to be happy living with him, and that my change in attitude would possibly (clutch at those straws!) bring about a change in him: aha I thought - a third way, entirely dependent on me shifting my attitude, and I tried that third way for years (I didn't stay in alanon for very long though, perhaps that was my mistake?).
My experience of al-anon, limited though it was, was that there was no focussing on the alcoholic at all, in fact people rarely mentioned partners or alcohol unless there was a newcomer, it was about trying to be a better person myself.
To be honest at the point I was at then, I really couldn't work with being told I had any more "defects of character" that needed attention, I was getting plenty of that at home (except they didn't tell me that, they were all working through their own problems, but because I was so anxious and frightened of people I applied all their personal insights about themselves to me). It was the wrong time for me, and counselling worked better for me. But the groups are all different and you won't know unless you try (they don't brain-wash you and hold you prisoner!) what have you got to lose?