As odd as it may sound.. having lived with an A and having lived through leaving an A and knowing I can't turn the clock back and warn myself of what to was to come.. I'm grateful I went through it and came out the other side.
It has made me who I am today. It brought people, places, things into my life which I would never have met/seen/done/etc had I not experienced what I experienced.
If I could turn back the clock/jump into a time machine and scoot back to one moment in time, I suppose I would visit myself in one particular (REALLY messed up) situation just before we moved in together. Already a year down the track with him, already seen enough red flags which should have sent me running for the hills.. but that final pull on the hook hadn't been made and I still had wriggle room enough to get free relatively painlessly.
I would quietly whisper to myself: 'This is a manipulation. A game. He is an alcoholic. He is not who you think he is or want him to be. THIS is who he is. You think you're so smart.. you're not.. not when it comes to this. You think he loves you.. he doesn't. You think everything will work out fine.. it won't. Trust your gut and your instincts.. that little voice you keep shussshing telling you to get into your car, drive away, don't look back'.
Tx