Old 02-01-2011, 02:53 PM
  # 11 (permalink)  
Shellcrusher
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Join Date: Jul 2010
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Originally Posted by Cyranoak View Post
...God bless them but f' them...
I may have to steal this and make it my sig.

Idul,
I struggle with boundaries too. Here's and example of one and what I did to change it and why it works.

Example:
For a while I thought my boundary would be that my wife shall absolutely not drink around me. Didn't work. Know why? It wasn't my boundary. It was me telling her what she can and can't do and we all know that doesn't work with our As. I can't control it.

How'd I change it?:
I decided that once I put my boy to bed, I was going to read a favorite book on my kindle. Downstairs. In the quiet time of the evening.

Why it works?:
It's all about me. Oddly enough, by reading alone somewhere else, my AW and I didn't have to interact. She did her thing, and perhaps it meant another glass of wine and I forgot about her and immersed myself in my book. Total head break and it was a healthy one.
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