Welcome to SR mybump, here you will find lots of ESH (experience, strength and hope).
I am so sorry for what you are going through but I am glad you found this site.
Take a look at the "Sticky" section on top of the forum, the "Classical Reading" section has lots of useful articles. Have you considered going to Alanon? those meetings are for Friends and Family of addicts and would help you cope, heal and feel less lonely.
I felt very lonely when an ex BF started acting up the same way. I went to AA meetings to try to understand 'his side' and those were helpful to me as well. Everyone was nice to me, and understood. I just showed up, listened and left, you don't have to say anything if you don't want to.
Knowing about alcoholism and all its faces helped me get a more realistic sense of what I was "fighting against".
You can't "help him through it". Who can help him through it? psychologists, doctors, specialists, fellow alcoholics in recovery. You have given him tools, contacts, chances to recover and he has ignored them. He has not hit bottom. No one knows when, or if, he will ever hit bottom.
Feel free to post here, seek real life support and remember there is much hope and peace to be enjoyed by you and your kids, the decisions of this man are only his to make; and you can decide if you allow him in your life or not, based on who he is now. Not who he COULD be, or MAY be someday. On who he IS now, as shown by his acts. (Words are easy to say, actions show reality)
I left the ex 2 years ago, today he drinks the same way (or more, he used to arrive to work with a hangover and now he arrives to work STILL drunk at 9 AM). He never admitted his issue, he got someone else willing to accept his way of drinking and his anger and his abuse. Had I waited to "help him" I would only have more emotional scars and pain in my heart. You can only base your decisions in the now, in reality, not in fantasies... it hurts a lot but you are not alone, and you deserve a life with peace, love and serenity...
Hugs!!