PS;
I read more...
you said " I should have thrown her out years ago, so I am responsible for the now..."
BINGO. And you can do that now. Forgive yourself. Your only crime was trusting and loving a sick person. NOw move the heck on. SHe will either get well, or ahe will fall further.
Do they teach you in training about the drowning man?
If a man is drowning, and he is in shock, if he is delerious and fighting you, and you are in rough water...Are you to struggle to save that man until he takes you down?
Is there a point in that training where they say, You should let go of a shocked, drowning man, who is resisiting rescue if he is causing you to go down as well?...
At some point you can only help her, you, and you children if you can still swim.