Originally Posted by
CSHNow 
Sorry but I can't help but wonder..... isn't it possible that your wife is suffering too and your reactions prove to her that she is as bad as she fears she is ? Maybe she is looking for some comfort and TLC ? I imagine the children would pick up on that as well. I have no idea what you are like of course but my father was VERY military and he was very difficult to live with. Sorry if that offends. Just wondering.
Your situation does sound difficult and I am sorry things are so bad for you, your wife, and your family. Are there relatives anywhere who may be able to take her in with the children to give you both some space or would that be too risky ? What about her own family ? Just thoughts...... take good care.
My family would take in the children, but she is not going anywhere with them. We tried this last summer, she went to stay with her parents and the kids for awhile. She ended up getting hammered even more, hanging out with "old friends" from school, because now she had a pair of anytime babysitters.
I do not run my household in strict military manner, I am an engineer, so not the ahrdcore soldier style you would think of from the movies. No, she is not looking for TLC, we have tried all that, no one really knows what her problem is. She had a great childhood, her and her sisters all have degrees, the other two are very successful, my wife plays piano in the church, she just has all these pills that Eff her up, and then she does stupid stuff. SHe doesn't think her behavior is bad, even after the videos and transcripts, she apologizes and says "I took some of my pills, sorry, I don't remember that", but never says she is sorry for the pills. She thinks everything is ok, because it never really happens as far as she is concerned. She thinks of it as the time she is asleep. Kind of like being held accountable for what happens in your dreams, that is what these events are to her, fuzzy, blurry dreams.