Nothing in the natural world ever 'goes back'.
Rivers don't go back.
Mountains don't go back.
Migrating animals don't even go back in the same way every time.
(ok maybe I watch too mych 'Nature' and 'Nova')
yes the HERD 'goes back' to the winter grounds
but it's often not the same animals.
There's a difference.
That's kinda what we're talking about the living in the past thing
only it's a longing for the past.
Either one keeps us out of the present.
The point of power...is in the present.
The only place change can occur ... is right here.
Not in the future...we're not there yet.
Not in the past... whatever it is/was cannot ever be undone.
Right here. Right now.
It isn't easy, I'm not saying 'thou shalt not look back'
but
we can learn to stop doing that
because it's just ...pain.
SOmetimes it's how we bring pain..
into an otherwise ... okay... present.
We learn through our recovery
that we don't have to look back any more
because we've learned that right here
is where the beauty is.
It takes a ton of committment and practice.
but what you're doing is natural
for where you are in this recovery thing.
if it becomes a habit
then it's a problem
like I talked about.
but for a while
what hurts
just has to hurt
until it ebbs
as we learn to keep moving.
Hope something in all that verbage helps.