How to have a healthy marriage in AA and Al-anon
Can anyone give me some feedback on how marriages can stay strong if a recovering alcoholic spends most free time in AA and the spouse goes to Al-anon to focus on them selves? If this is a life long process how could the marriage ever be healthy if both people are only concerned with their own needs?
I was raised in a non-drinking family that all loved each other and things were done for the best interest of everyone in the entire family. This meant that there were times of give and take. We all had our own hobbies and outside interests. This concept seems much healthier than each person only focusing on themselves to me.
My husband has been sober for 6 months and I still am trying to figure out if there is even a place or time for me in my husband’s life. If your needs are being neglected while the person in recovery is emerged in AA isn't Al-anon teaching you to be indifferent therefore allowing yourself to be neglected? I completely understand and support that my husband needs to spend a lot of time in AA and also working on his program outside of the meetings. Last week my husband said he could set aside 30 minutes a week to talk or spend time together; this feels very minimal considering he is not currently working.
Any insight would be appreciated.