Boy do I ever know how you're feeling. I have been there many many times. But do you know what I realized about that? In my experience it was my relationship with THAT PERSON that created those feelings of helplessness and needing to be held and protected in the first place. I discovered that it is actually a tactic that alcoholics and addicts used on me to keep me in the relationship!! When I realized that I couldn't believe how many times I had fallen for it. They will say the most hurtful things, and reveal the most hurtful behaviors that they have done, just to HURT me so that I go running back to them.
A couple years ago, I found my Higher Power. I truly began to BELIEVE in a Higher Power. And the last time I was hurting like you are, I asked my Higher Power to please help me. And this feeling of peace immediately came upon me. In a second I stopped crying and felt a strength of heart within me. It was miraculous to me and I will never forget it.
You have a strength within you that you do not know. We all do. But when we surround ourselves with people who are sick, selfish, manipulative and uncaring, that strength is drained and hidden from us. I promise you that the longer you stay away from people like that, the stronger you will become. Please do get to AlAnon. Because there you will be surrounded by people who are also trying to regain their strength. And this will help you.
Here are my arms wrapped around you: (((hugs))). I hope that gives you some strength today.