you might like to try and sign up on a "stepfamily" forum. I think you'll get a lot more feedback from people in similar situations. I was a member for meany years when I first had to go through that and I still am. There's many topics including what you're going through.
here's one example:
Stepfamily Network - Helping to Support Stepfamilies through Sharing and Discussion
if you don't find this one comfortable, there's some others.