We feel, me especially though (as a mother myself) that trying to understand mum's mindset will help in the future. What if my stepdaughter turns round to us one day and says 'why didn't mum want to treat my headlice, or make sure my clothing was clean?'. We want to be able to give her answers, even though we know we won't be able to answer everything. We don't want her to become an adult with all these issues hanging over her, and if we can't answer her questions, to try and find someone who can.
I'd pick and choose the words and moments to say anything.
I either say nothing, save it for later, or just be plain blunt. "Because you're mother is a shi...t face, that's why". But then again, people know me to talk like that and I know it's not the best method for everyone.
