I read recently on another thread that it made the decision to leave the relationship easier when you actually leave and break the contact. And this is very true! I am almost 6 weeks into the no contact and it had made my thinking clearer which has empowered me to stick to my decision that ending my 10 year relationship is the wisest decision I have made for myself.
I moved out in Nov but we remained in contact because he wanted to work things out which in active addict language means he wanted to continue to use without me present so that his addiction could thrive with no interference.
You are by far to special of a person to accept his demotion to become his "secret".
Do you want to be hidden?
Do you want to be tucked away on a back shelf only to be taken out when it's convenient for him?
He's in active addiction don't let him with his Ill thinking run YOUR relationship and make decisions that greatly impact you.
I wouldn't think of boarding a bus that is going to travel a major highway knowing the driver is intoxicated yet as codies we board the bus of life allowing the addicts to steer.
Time to empower yourself, time to start driving your own bus and head to a safer place in your life.