I had a male counselor tell me once that "all men watch porn."
I fired him.
I agree with LaTeeDa: You can't change him, you can only determine whether you want to live with this behavior or not. And I agree with you: It's just another addiction.
I also think that when someone has an addiction, be it alcohol or gambling or internet porn, it
is basically the same thing. It's just that when it has to do with sex, it's harder to see it as "just another addiction" because it feels like "he's replacing me with those women on the internet." But really, whether he chooses a bottle, a needle, or an image of a woman on the internet and gives any of those priority over his real life relationships, it's the same thing.
I've said many times that my AH, who is deeply religious and (if only for fear of hellfire) did not touch porn in any form, had a mistress who lived with us in the house and who always took precedent over me and the children. That was his bottle.
I'm not trying to belittle your pain. I'm trying to say that the way I look at it, it's "just" another addiction, and it doesn't reflect any more negatively on you as a wife and a woman than his alcohol addiction.
But I also think all of us know that whether it's alcohol or porn, the fact that a loved one chooses it over us does a number on our hearts.
