Well said stella.
Donna, I'm still working on my own recovery with an AW and I am pretty darn sure that the friends and family walk the harder path.
It's different and easier for me because I'm the big feller with the little drunk AW. I don't run and hide from her and if she was passed out drunk and had to be somewhere, she wouldn't be getting a wake up call from me. I'd let her go about her business.