Hi, I'm a newb and this is my first post, but the title caught my eye and I can identify with that feeling so very much. My s/o of 20 years was arrested for DUI 9 years ago. His lawyer advised him to immediately get into AA (and stop drinking of course) and he did what he was told to do. He went to meetings every day, although I could see that he never really embraced the whole 12 step concept and wasn't comfortable with the 'higher power' and religious aspect, but he went and he stayed sober. Right up until his court date and maybe even a while afterwards but he started drinking again, albeit not when he was driving so that was a benefit.
I know he carries a bottle of vodka in his car, and I have been tempted very often to call our local police, anonymously, and report him as a drunk driver, even though he wouldn't be, but if they found the open container, it would still be illegal. That's what happens when you are desperate to help someone you love. I haven't done it, and I haven't been able to get him to get help yet, but I am not giving up even though this relationship is killing me.