How Would You (Or Have you) Handled telling your family you're in AlAnon?
I've been in AlAnon for over a yr. And I am so grateful for the program and this site.
My qualifier is my son in law - who I believe to be a dry alcoholic. I haven't told my daughter (or my SIL) that I go to meetings. The times I've attended when she's been in town, I said I was attending a Women's Group. (which it sort of is - an all women AlAnon meeting.) It just feels really weird lying to her. She is coming back in town -by herself - in Feb and I know I'll be going to meetings so that's the reason I'm looking for some insight.
I've felt guilty not sharing this with my daughter. But I'm also afraid of the reaction sharing would cause. I think she'll be stunned and upset. But my SIL, who can have really inappropriate reactions to the slightest incident - will bring more trouble to their home. His history is to sulk and say nothing to us, but then make it difficult for my daughter by being angry with her parents and putting her in the middle.
My sponsor suggested I keep my motivation in mind. And when I think of that I feel:
(1) I don't like lying to my daughter. We've always been very close & honest with each other.
(2) I would like her to know there are healthy options to his behavior. But then that places me in a judgmental position about her husband, I know.
If I don't tell her . . . I know I will continue to get healthy and pray that they do too.
Any insight y'all have I would really appreciate. Thank you!