Welcome Joe - I can relate to trying the "controlled drinking" approach (probably most everyone here has tried it). We start to feel better and when that itch comes up again, we forget why we wanted to stay sober in the first place.
You sound determined to make this work - so that's awesome. I think you'll find that this forum can add alot to your recovery. To me, it's like AA at my fingertips.
Hang in there - you can do it!
