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Old 01-16-2011, 07:48 AM
  # 16 (permalink)  
LexieCat
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Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: South Jersey
Posts: 16,633
I was married for fourteen years to a guy who got sober a year before we got married. For the first several years we kept NO alcohol in the house. After several years, I asked whether he would mind if I bought a bottle of brandy for the holidays. By then, he said it wouldn't bother him as long as it didn't hang around AFTER the holidays. He still preferred not having it in the house as a regular thing. He never objected to my having a few drinks at a party (that was back when I could have a few drinks--my own alcoholism didn't develop until we had divorced--and who knows, maybe it would have manifested sooner if I could have booze whenever I wanted when we were married).

The way I see it, people have a right to feel safe and comfortable in their own homes. If not having booze around staring him in the face all the time is important to that, then I think that's his right. You don't have to go along with it, of course, but it would probably strain your relationship at the very least.

Good that you are having these discussions now, though, while there isn't any pressure or tension about it. Most non-alcoholics can adjust rather easily to not having alcohol in their homes.
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