Originally Posted by
whereisthisgoin 
Oh god, what if he says, "i agree to rehab and to quit drinking. Let me stay."
That one gives me heart palpitations. I need the craziness to stop and I know him staying in the house keeps us in crazyville.
Being under the same roof with active alcoholism=crazyville for me. My axw was court ordered into rehab (probably NEVER works) for 30 daze.
I was afraid I wouldn't be able to take care of our, then, 5yo little girl. It's funny, but my greatest fear was that I wouldn't be able to do "ponytails" with my big old "man fingers".
That first Monday morning school day, my daughter asked me what was wrong. I told her about the man fingers thing.
She just laughed, asked me for the hair band thingie, whipped it onto her wrist, used both hands behind her head, and in about 2 seconds whipped out a pretty presentable ponytail. I knew we'd be alright at that moment.
Seems like my HP was giving me a "test run" to show me I had nothing to worry about. Turns out I "could", at age 54 raise a little girl w/o a drunk wife "helping". Four years later, so far so good. Knock wood.
Just having that non-stop chaos and drama out of the house for those 4 weeks gained me about 60% of my
clarity back. Actually, that's probably about all I had to begin with. I never allowed her to come home after that.
We have had lots of hard times since then, but we have SERENITY in our little apartment. I would NEVER go back to that other life, with all the stuff.
I think separation (getting active alcoholism out from under your roof) promotes clarity. I've seen it over and over, here and IRL.
Thanks and God bless us all,
Coyote