Originally Posted by
BookLover1978 
Between my brother & I we have three kids & she's missing out on them all growing up, you don't get that time back & it's making me madder & madder! her son/my brother could really do with some support right now for himself the baby & his wife & she is just sat at home with vodka feeling sorry for herself, drinking herself to into oblivion. Arghh!.
One of the great lessons I learned here on SR (and elsewhere) was that I had to accept that MY dreams are MY dreams...and not necessarily the same as others'.
You want your (sober) mom to be a part of the grandkids' life.
You want to talk to your (sober) mother on the phone when
you need her friendship and support.
You want to stop worrying so much so
you will feel better.
Obviously what she wants and what you want are polar opposite things. She has made her choice. She is an adult. She gets to choose.
So do you. You have only two choices here: Accept her
as she is now or don't.
I'm sorry. It's a big pill to swallow. I understand.
Nturn is right -- your brother's family needs your energy and prayers now.
(((Hugs)))