I say it takes about three years of constant reassurance, complete access to each others emails, accts..trust building, and cutting temptation (including certainly people) our of your life in order to patch a marriage. Seems like a long time but if you have had more happy years together than that, you can work through three years. Too many people bail on a marriage once it gets to be too hard..marriages can be fixed. That is not to say that if you are in fear for your life or are being abused that you should ever stay in a marriage like that. Just be really kind to each other. Remove all profanity from your vocabulary and take every opportunity to be gentle and do nice things for your spouse. Post it notes of thanks, make their coffee in the morning, tuck them in bed at night, read to them, compliment them and praise them alot if they do something nice for you. Don't worry about a lack of sex. Lots of marriages have little to no sex and are quite happy. As long as you are intimate (hugging, petting, nuzzling) you are just fine. I know some folks will disagree with me on the sex thing, but I have known lots of happy couples that do not share a bed. Life happens and we all just roll with it.