I agree with you. I believe that alcoholics are responsible for their behavior.
When one chooses to drink and drive he is responsible for the consequences of that choice.
When someone chooses to drink and throws away relationships with spouses, old friends and adult children, he is responsible for those choices.
Here's something that took me many years to realize. When I tried talking with my AH, I failed miserably over and over again because I didn't understand that I was talking to a stranger with a compromised brain. The person I used to know was gone. This was true even at those times he appeared to be sober because his "Boozy-out-of- whack" thinking took over much of his life.