Hi newlywed! I am so glad you're here!! This is a wonderfully supportive place, with lots of folks who have experienced what you are going through right now. I am one!
I dated my XABF (ex-alcoholic boyfriend) for three years. From the minute we started dating my intuition (that little voice in my head) told me that his drinking was a problem for me. But, he was sooooo great in so many ways that I simply did not entertain the thought of us NOT being together. So, I tried and tried to accept his drinking even though it made my skin crawl, I tried putting myself in therapy, I tried redirecting my anger, I tried, and tried, and tried to paint a different picture of the truth. The truth was just too painful to bear- I had committed myself to a man who just was not right for me. I explained to him many times that I had a problem with his drinking, but he never, ever did anything to change.
We broke up about 2 months ago. He STILL does not get it. I, however, am experiencing an inner peace and serenity and I am so thankful for that.
Anyway- sorry to ramble! This is just my experience- which is really the only thing I can offer. My humble suggestion is that you keep posting, do try an AlAnon meeting, and keep looking to find your truth. And, read as many of the posts on this forum, as well as the stickies on the top of the page.
((((((HUGS))))))
craven