Wow, thank you for the link Jazz. I've been talking with my father most of the day and working out logistics of how I could move back home for a few months to make sure she went to meetings and therapist appointments and didn't buy more alcohol at the store. Which it sounds like would have set me back majorly, created a lot of resentment on all sides, and done none of what I wanted it to do. =/ Which is disheartening.
If I can't tell my father that I'm moving home to help him with her and make things better... what can I say? He gave up taking care of the bills himself a year ago. She has full access to their finances and has taken them from 13k in savings to 17k in debt. I want him (even before coming here) to close out the cards and take all matters of money away from her, giving her only a little cash for necessities each week. He's already started a secret emergency fund for himself in case something happens but... is it the right thing to do? Seperate their finances and have him take more control so he isn't taken down with her?
To Phoenix--
Hi! And I actually joined therapy myself about 3 weeks ago-- a cognitive behavioral therapist. I've been out of the house for 8 years, and I've noticed I tend to overextend myself for friends to the point it hurts myself. Currently in the hole about 4k because of it. I know I need help. I thought my mom was fine though, until just recently. Now I am wondering if she hasn't been addicted to something (overeating/shopping) when I was living at home. Alcohol just being the newest and most socially unacceptable form. Its a lot to think on.
Last edited by Bella19; 01-03-2011 at 03:42 PM.
Reason: responding to additional post