Teggie, you gotta have faith. That is believing in something without proof. It took a very long time for me to feel comfortable with this concept. For me it was difficult due to all the pain and hardship put on me by people of the male persuasion in my life. Now I have found that my higher power truly exists within me. It is so much easier for me to accept my higher power as being female and so much more like my mother than my father. My higher power is the mother, friend and sister I never had. I pray and she helps me deal with my "baggage". Rather than handing over my baggage, my higher power helps me sort through it and learn what I need to from each piece.
Hope this helps.