Hallelua, I recommend you step back and analyze your relationship you shared with your husband. By what you described it sounds like a lot of things were not being shared between the two of you. Good communication is one of the most important requirements in a successful marriage. Good communication begins with the ability to exchange ideas, facts, feelings, attitudes, and beliefs. Without good communication, anger, tension, and frustration sets in. Politeness, tact, and consideration are required if communication is to be productive. One of the most important human needs is for acceptance and appreciation. Partners need to know that they can accept each other's word, believe in each other, depend on each other to keep promises, and be faithful to commitments that are made. They need to be honest and sincere.
Successful marriage requires a high degree of motivation: the desire to make it work and a willingness to expend personal time and effort. Successful married couples spend sufficient and quality time together. They enjoy each other's company, share common interests and activities, and laugh together. Partners who like, admire, and support each other, are proud of each other, and build each other's self-esteem are fulfilling their emotional needs in a satisfying relationship. One important expectation of most married partners is that they will meet each others need for love and affection. In order to have a successful marriage each partners ideals or expectations are fulfilled. Marital success is more attainable if the commitment is mutual.
However, marriage can never fulfill every need. Most people want some separateness in their togetherness. One of the hardest tasks is to balance commitment with personal autonomy and freedom. Adaptable, flexible people recognize that people differ in the way they think, in their attitudes, values, habits, and ways of doing things. They don't insist that everyone be a carbon copy of themselves. They recognize that life is not static, that people and circumstances change.
In successful marriages, love grows, but changes over the years with fewer components of romanticism and stronger bonds of attachment and affection. Emotional bonding and affective expression are important ingredients of marital success. All couples experience problems and stress. Successful couples are able to solve their problems, manage stress in a creative way, and have a greater tolerance for frustration. Successful marriage depends upon the mutual assumption, sharing, and division of responsibility in the family. Selfishness in marriage lessens each partners willingness to assume responsibility for the relationship. The most successful relationships are based on a spirit of mutual helpfulness. The people who are the most self-centred and self-serving are less likely to feel fulfilled and happy and are less often able to bring happiness to their relationships.
Just my personal opinion. Take what you like and leave the rest.
Love and Peace,
Phoenix