Now would be a good time to thank God you never got married!!!
I used to volunteer on a domestic abuse hotline and I can tell you with all assurance that he definitely fits the profile of an abuser. It can be difficult to see when you are in the middle of it all--living it--and the control is insidious. He seems particularly adept!
I'd like to recommend a book that will be VERY helpful for you to read: Why Does He Do That? by Lundy Bancroft. You should be able to find a used copy online for about $5.00-6.00.
I would also like to point out (and you'll learn the same in the book if you read it) that controlling, abusive men are notoriously difficult to treat successfully. Please don't fool yourself into thinking that a few trips to the psychologist and a handful of AA meetings will do the trick. Chances are great that he is ONLY doing those things as a manipulation to get back with you -- you have clearly stated this is required, so that's why he's doing it! A month or two from now things will most likely be exactly the same--or maybe much worse.
I say, "Get while the gettin's good!" But that's just my $0.02!
How old is this guy anyway?