<I> Hey, what struck me was how you can "force" yourself to not drink... It's not so much the quantity, ya know? </I>
If I stay busy, I dont think about it much. So I would just force myself to stay busy, work, go to the gym, tire myself out, eat dinner, watch the news on Tivo, pack it in and go to bed. Its the early evening idle hours that were tempting.
<I> I was also struck by your previous history in AA... care to go into that a little?</I>
In my late teens I suffered real bad depression, suicidal thoughts, etc. I used to drink to shut down the thoughts. I entered AA for about 6-8 months, once the depression lifted, I didn't feel like drinking. Stayed mostly dry for 20 years, slowly fell off the wagon onto moderation, which after 8-10 years or so, turned into abuse.
I have none of those former thoughts about depression. Really, nothing to complain about, house is paid, kids are grown, marriage is fine, nothing to be sad about, but I know drinking 6 beers a night most of the week is not good. Probably my mind harkens back to those AA days, when I was drinking straight scotch. So here I am. Time to change my life again. Thanks for asking.