I totally get you on the couch thing. It drove me insane because we had one comfortable place in the house, one tv, etc. but apparently me and four little kids could sit in the floor or hang out in the kitchen all night every night. :sigh: How the hell does anyone detach/accept etc from that I have no idea. I couldn't. Leave and go somewhere when they are miserable and making everyone else miserable. I tried it. I really did. So infants and little kids off to the park (or shopping if it was to cold which is a riot with four tired kids) - even when we really wanted to hang out at home, take a bath and relax in the evening, had laundry and cooking and all the things it takes to run a household to do. Yet one drunk man commandeers the house to drink beer, feel sorry for himself, and watch TV and/or sleep while we take off. I did it but I wasn't detached. I was seething. I could not figure it out - and still can't.
My xah wasn't a bad guy either.