FGB,
It's ok to be a little sad about it. The good news is that your not letting the sadness rule your world like we a lot of the times do. Good for you!
I just sent my brother/addict/alcoholic a box of stuff to the halfway house he is staying in. I wondered if I sent too much though. But I'm the big Sis and I sent it anyways. I don't want to do too little or too much either. But I don't know where to draw the line. I think you sending the $5 for ciggs was a good thing. Just enough to let him know you care, but not enough to be enabling.
Take care of you...