Originally Posted by
jds0401 
You're the first person here I noticed is in a situation similar to mine...my AH's DOC was heroin, he quit 15 years ago and never looked back (He quit heroin before I met him). The alcohol started slowly...and while he recognizes he has addictive tendencies he can't seem to let go of the idea that "alcohol" since it is a socially acceptable vice (in his mind anyway, I don't agree) is something he can handle. He's been toying with the idea of recovery and has tried and failed to quit multiple times.
I quit drinking not for him but because I personally can't stand it even socially after I've seen what it can do (I also don't like altering my state of mind even a little - one drink does that as far as I'm concerned)....since he's not committed to a recovery program yet I can't answer the question of if it would help him were he a RAH. I can say the choice was mine, and for me, not for him.
I had a question for you if you don't mind: how did your RABF come to accept/realize that it wasn't just painkillers that were a problem but also alcohol?
Wow, 15 years! That's great as far as the heroin goes, but I'm confused...did he NEVER work a program? Has he been toying with the idea of recovery for the alcohol?
I'm not sure my RABF has recognized that alcohol is a problem too...I mean, he has for NOW, it being so early in his recovery he recognized ANY mind altering substance as a problem, but he too claims that alcohol was never his problem and he could always handle it. This is a new thing though, he had previously recognized that a drug is a drug is a drug...
My BF works an INTENSE program... 30 day detox followed by 6 months of sober living (in progress, near the end), book work daily, meetings 2x a day, groups, sponsor talks every day...it's a lot of work. So, I think being so embedded in this program has deterred these thoughts about possibly drinking in the future thus far. Plus, the people in his program to to mostly AA meetings despite being drug addicts, so I think it's more situational than his own realization. I know recovery is a life-long process and I just don't know how an addict can remain in recovery and active in these meetings while drinking here and there...