DesertEyes

Hey there chicory (((( hugs )))))

Well now why would you _not_ care? You are a kind, compassionate and giving woman. Of course you care, you care for the _good_ parts in him, the parts that were once worth loving. I don't see anything wrong with that at all.

I care for my ex, just like you. She has a lot of good in her. What I have to be careful of is to keep my love on the virtue side of the scale, and not let it back-slide into the codependency side where it becomes a defect.

That's what this disease does. It maks us into angry people, something we never would become otherwise. That's why I go to meetings, work the steps, have a sponsor. I don't want to become a sour, angry, spiteful person as a result of this disease.

I don't think he rejected you. I think the bad side of him rejects _everything_ good in the world. You just happened to be standing there. He would reject anybody else as well, not just you.

What you have _is_ of real value, but only to others who have the same kindness, compassion and willingness to give. He was a good man, like my ex is a good woman. They just let the bad side take over and turn them into something ugly.

I understand. It is very sad to watch someone destroy themselves. Me? I am getting much better at staying away from those people. I stay close to healthy, positive, kind folks. Like the ones here on SR

Mike