hwsm,
I am you only I married mine thinking that all he needed was a stable environment. Alcoholism didn't exist in my family or my social circle so I really didn't even know what it was. I thought an alcoholic was someone who drank too much every now and then. I later learned that it goes much deeper than that and my wonderful life became insane. I literally lost myself trying to fix him. And I didn't even know the meaning of insane until I lived in it. I'm telling you, girlfriend, lick your wounds and be thankful that you have the courage to see it for what it is. I saw it for what I wanted it to be and ended up divorced. I'm now getting back to to where I started and life feels pretty good again but I went through hell in the process. Please keep posting and also consider going to AlAnon if you haven't. I found this forum first and it saved my life. AlAnon enriches it. Feel free to PM me and WELCOME to the forum.