I identify in a way, because I'm in amazement at how mature my kids are with my AH--they tell him how they feel in a non-judgemental way--they don't run, they don't minimize reality, they tell it like it is, and they then let it go. I'm in awe of them, and I learn from them often.
On the contrary, I tend to want to run. I repress my feelings.
When we went to Europe as a family, my oldest son was the dad. He would grab his dad by the shoulders when we emerged from a restaurant in which AH had drunk himself silly, and he'd say, "Now, Dad, don't move. I'm going to get the car and I'll be RIGHT BACK." He had just graduated from college at the time, and I was so grateful for his presence and take-charge attitude. But at the same time I was ashamed of this upside-down aspect to the family. So I know how you feel.
My rationale for why we are this way has to do with ACOA patterns of never wanting to make waves. Funny thing is, just telling how you feel doesn't really make waves. And if it does, so what? The wave settles back into the sea, and you have maintained your integrity.