Not doing the right thing? According to who? Forget what anyone else tells you; your opinion is all that matters. Not recovered enough or fast enough? Balderdash. Cut yourself some slack. You've only been a member of this forum for a little over a year. Some of us, like me, have been here for years longer than that and still struggle with some issues. Codependency incurable? Battlestar bullcraptica. I see lots of people here, like me, who are now leading peaceful, serene, happy, and healthy lives despite a few shortcomings that may still need work.
Alanon and the 12 steps not a good fit for you? Find something that is. While I recommend Alanon as an option because it has helped many on this forum, it wasn't right for me. I wasn't comfortable with the face-to-face meetings. Participating on this forum and reading all I could about alcoholism and codependency was a good fit for me and all I needed to turn my life around.
Alanon, the 12 steps, even this forum is not a one-size-fits-all solution. It's not even a one-size-fits-most solution. The right solution for you is as individual as you are.
Please don't judge yourself or your progress on what anyone else here is saying or doing. All that matters is that you are still working towards improving your situation.
It's the work that matters; not the path you take.