Dating a recovering alcoholic
Hello everyone. I am new to this site and hope to gain some insight for my concern. I know this is a very typical and often spoken of topic that was probably posted before, however this is a first for me.
I began dating my boyfriend about half a year ago. He is thirteen years older than I. When I first met him, he had told me he decided to quite alcohol completely, simply as a New Years resolution and for no other reason.. However I knew in my gut he must of quit alcohol for more reason than that.. But It didn't bother me, and we started a lovely relationship together. He never drank a drop.
As time progressed, I noticed he began to drink occasionally, and I also began to learn more about his past.. As someone who spent most of their life in the bar and food industry, he has been exposed to alcohol and the party scene for quite some time. It then got to the point that he was drinking every night, and I felt a change in him.
The good news is that he decided to quit drinking again, and has not drank in quite some time.. He also decided to quit on his own terms and was not pushed to do so. The reason why my concern is a little peculiar is because he has been able to stop for long periods of time in the past. Serving alcohol and seeing other people drink does not bother him either. There's a part of me that thinks he has all of this under control, but there's also a part of me that feels that maybe this is a bigger problem then I'm led to believe. He doesn't have the behavior of an alcoholic, but at some points he lacks self control and will continue to drink. There has been times in his life where he was drinking constantly, and it even caused him to have a seizure at one point.. This seems to be the pattern of his life that just goes back and forth. He feels he starts drinking out of boredom, and does not use alcohol to self medicate unsolved issues. He does not attend meetings or seek counseling, but claims he has this under control.
What am I to expect in the coming months of his sobriety? He does admit he has a problem, which is good that he is not in denial, I'm just concerned if maybe he is taking it lightly.
How do I support someone in this case? What is your feed back?
Thank you very much for taking the time and consideration to read this.