I think a whole array of emotions come out from living with addictions. I am an ACoA (more accurately child of crack/meth addict) and currently separated from an AH. I found living with my AH I had episodes of depression, but mostly suffered from LOTS of anxiety in trying to keep up. Like Lotus I always (as a kid and adult) distracted myself from the pain and just ran around with friends whenever things got tough. I am just now learning to get in touch with my feelings and deal with them for the first time and it can be uncomfortable. Either way I hope you can find a way to treat the depression and move forward. Best to you!