Well, it's been 3 months since I posted on this thread. You might say there's been a lot going on. There was a big showdown a few weeks after my last post, which ultimately resulted in my wife going into detox and an inpatient rehab program and family coming out to help take care of the baby. Lasted in rehab about 3 weeks. Relapsed 3 days later, back in the ER 3 days after that on alcohol and xanax. Sober for a week, then drunk again. Through all of this she managed to get two CPS reports filed against her by the hospital.
Her mom is staying with us to watch the baby, while I've moved finances around and talked to an attorney. She started going to AA last week (one meeting per week), started seeing a therapist (again, once a week). That's as far as she's willing to go. I can see the tension building up inside of her the past few days (she's been sober for about 10 days now), I hate being so cynical but it seems like only a matter of time before another crash.
I know this sounds like a rather sad post, but I actually wanted to say thank you to everyone who had commented earlier...that was the beginning of finding myself again. Her family and I still say a prayer for her now and then, and hope that she chooses a more aggressive course of treatment and support, but accept that it's out of our hands.