I am so glad that you found us. SR is a wonderful place, filled with so much wisdom, experience and support.
I highly recommend Al-anon, and there are meetings on-line, if you are unable to get to one physically at the moment.
Keep reading and posting, and try to relax as best you can. You have taken a great first step, just to begin to get information and learn about this disease and what it has done to you.
Take care of you, your babies need you