I have to echo Pelican's concern for YOU. Please go to alanon and find some support.We can't save anyone and we all know because we have all tried.It just doesn't work.I am so sorry about your situation and can hear the pain and desperation you are feeling. My daughter is a heroin addict and was in abusive relationships as well. It is a helpless awful feeling. But once I got off the roller coaster and started getting recovery myself, changes happened with my daughter. She is very newly in recovery and while I didn't "get her there" by stopping enabling her and modeling recovery, I made it harder for her to continue a life of active addiction.