Busy, it is important to be honest with your self weather or not you are an "alcoholic" or not is up to you. knowing you have a problem controlling your drinking and doing something about it would seem like a wise choice to me. what are you going to do about it? 1) you can stop drinking and live your life as a person who doesnt drink any more or 2) you can continue trying to prove you are not like them by trying to drink with moderation. it sounds to me like #2 has been failing you. do the sensible thing and stop drinking. today is a good day to start your journey as a person who doesnt drink. you can do it. the best advice i can give you is dont drink one day at a time. take charge of your life.