Again, I am truly thankful for all of your input. I know my problem is projecting into the future, overthinking, and rushing to find all the answers at the same time. Thank you for reminding me that my decisions are not a contract or set in stone, and I can choose to attend whichever meetings are working best for me. I have faith in my HP that I will choose the right path, and that everything will be okay. I am more than willing to work for it, I am so sick of sticking it out day after day instead of truly living and being present in my life. Big hugs to all. This website is my saving grace, I look forward to logging on every evening, it almost feels like home to me I know that may sound strange.