Interesting responses, people. I'm not a religious person in any way when it comes to 'higher power' ideas. I'm here on the earth for a short period of time and I'm completely responsible for my own actions as far as I can tell, for better or worse. I'll take blame and credit where it's due. Same goes for the wife with the exception of a tendency towards eastern thinking re reincarnation, karma, etc.
So I'm not sure I can relate to AlAlnon if I can't get on board with their foundation. I also care about her so doing something that hurts her further (like letting her self-destruct) is counter-intuitive to me. I accept that in the long run it might be the best for everyone however.
So how do you answer when the kids ask "Is mommy drunk again?"
How do I look to the future knowing my attraction to my partner is evaporating and I still have persistent and undeniable physical needs?
I will not run out on the family and I don't think I have the right to ask her to leave either. Oy....