It is wrong, to treat me this way, and it happened too much in my life, and now, i have a choice. I deserve dignity, for i try hard to do for others, and to be an honest and good person. I have helped him more than anyone (maybe it was not really so helpful after all, but anyway), and he does not have the right to treat me disrespectfully. Why do I let him? I have feelings, I have rights, I have a heart that hurts when it is taken for granted.
You are so right, he will never respect me. If I dont demand respect and take up for myself, I will get used like an old rag. I act like an old rag.
chicory,
my daughter called me again last night drunk. crying that she has nobody that cares about her, that she just wants it to be her sister, her brother her and me living together, (to forget about my husband and his son) that her daddy screwed her up emotionally by physically abusing me (I've been divorced over 10 yrs) and that is messing with the way she handles relationships, that she's thinking about giving her daughter away cause she's just too messed up.............................that David, (current boyfriend) is good and never hit her, (last week she said he did hit her, so I don't know which is which unless she had another alcoholic fit and attacked him?).
I'm dealing with this over the phone. Can you imagine if I had to deal with this (all over again) right in my house. I might as well just kill myself right now.
I really think she needs to be admitted for psychiatric evaluation. No, I mean seriously. She's either playing me and using her daughter to pull my heart strings, or she's seriously sick in which case, I cannot help her.
I keep thinking what if we let her come back and give her a chance to get herself together and she can feel family love and support. Of course I want to help her, I'm still her mother. But then I think of how it was when she use to live with us. It was 24/7 chaos. It was at that time that I use to drink, just to drown her out of my head. I was going through cancer treatment with chemo and drinking just to be able to put up with her.
I think I'd rather not bring her back. I can try to help somehow from a distance or nothing will change.
chicory, I'm just sharing this because you might be feeling this too. Either now, or later when he starts calling you and begging you to come back. It's heart wrenching. And today I just feel so damn tired. I was hoping to have a relaxing weekend. It seems every time Friday approaches, I feel this dread in my stomach. "Am I going to get a phone call today?"
Good luck and courage to you chicory.