Originally Posted by
chicory 
if i know that he is in the shelter, i will not worry nearly as much.
My mother is a chronic worrier. If there isn't something to worry about, she'll find something that she can worry over.
It
hurts my heart to see the devastating effects on her health, both physical and mental, from worry. What a price to pay for an emotion that does nothing to change the situation at hand.
You are allowing your worry to be controlled by your son's circumstances (and alcoholism), dear. You are hinging your reality off of him. You do in fact have the power to take charge of your life in that area too.
My 32 year old AD will most likely never seek recovery. My grandchildren have/still are paying the consequences.
My mother gets 4 hours of sleep a night. It's been that way for
years over the situation with AD and the children.
I sleep well at night.
I again reminded my mom the other day during a phone call that if I feel worry creeping in, I close my eyes and envision a big pair of hands-God's loving hands. I put all that worry in those hands and let it go.
Her reply? "I can't just do that!"
It's not that she can't. She won't.
She's
comfortable with worrying regardless of the consequences to her health. She defines herself by her excessive worry and hinging her reality off of others.
Dad supports this mindset sadly enough, and has often said that she is a martyr who has earned her place in heaven through all the suffering and worry she has endured.
Is change uncomfortable? Certainly.
Is change possible? Certainly.
A lifetime of ingrained emotions and reactions doesn't get changed overnight.
It takes time and repetition.
God is either everything, or he is nothing.
Who would you be without all that worry?
