I'm sorry, WI...
I gave my 33 yo AS so many "one more chances" I lost count. Finally, I hit bottom and have had to go "no contact" with him for awhile. I just can no longer watch him destroy himself. It was killing me.
Even if your husband is not on board with asking him to leave right now, you can still go to some Alanon or Naranon meetings for yourself. They will help keep you focused on your recovery. Also, if you don't already have it, get the book, "The Language of Letting Go" by Melodie Beattie.
My husband, who is my son's stepfather, was able to see what was happening long before I could accept and admit it. He was so patient with me and my continued attempts to "help" my son into recovery. He would only gently tell me truthfully what he saw and then let the decision be mine. Maybe that would work better with your husband? As Chino said, "we don't know what another enabler's bottom is." Your husband is just not there yet.
with love,