Originally Posted by
Pelican 
I would not want someone attending a meeting with me if they themselves were not planning to work on their own recovery. I would not be willing to open up and share as honestly as needed while I had an outsider sitting in the room. Just me.
Don't you think that maybe the OP's ex feels just like that about the men who are making her feel uncomfortable in her group? Behaving so utterly inappropriately around a new member is hardly working on their recovery is it?