Thanks for everyone's helpful words and for reading my story.
I understand, walking away makes the most sense. Enduring this BS is worth sticking with my wife. She is a good person, doesn't take advantage of people but usually gets taken advantage of (usually money wise) because of her good nature. They have worn her down her entire life, and all of this recent info was just too much. Leaving her would be leaving her alone to these jackals.
Most of her siblings in many ways resent her Im sure. Their upbringing was different, more violent and uncaring. My wife has 2 older brothers and 3 older half brothers and 1 older half sister. She was a late comer as she is 9 years younger than the next youngest kid. Her dad did not molest her (he molested/raped the half sister/his stepdaughter) and treated my wife very well actually. Never hit her, never yelled at her, unlike all the other kids. Of course my wife has endured molestation from other relatives growing up, as have I.
Sounds like excuses, i know...
A bad part about walking away was our ignorance and early trusting of her dad. (here comes our dumbest moment) Although we went in together on this place by paying 1/3rd, its fully in his name (i can hear your groans already) and is promised in his will to us. Yeah, we were stupid. We had no reason not to trust him and didn't understand back then how bad a move it was.
I admit to being a weak willed person at times. Nice, kind, and easily stepped on, controlled by my anxieties. But my wife is all I have as I have no contact with any of my family after my parents passed many years ago.
Financial wise we were ok for the longest time but are not in a great place. Recession hit us at a bad time. she was laid off and i took some pay cuts, all the while i was having medical issues and had lots of doctor visits and some surgeries. So those bills are piled up.
I guess I know what options I have. I can recall many occasions looking at people in bad situations and thinking "just leave!"
Not so easy when its you.