Hello, I've been lurking for a while, and I just wanted to say thank you for this site. It's helping me a lot.
This little rant is about the amazing ability the alcoholic is at manipulation.
My son is 28 and has been drinking/drugging since he was 16. I have been lending him money, finding him furniture(because he keeps abandoning his)lending him money, lending him money
.
Anyway I finally said no more. You are on your own. So what does he do? He goes in the back door. He moves in with his struggling single mother sister(wow, did you understand that?).
So now he isn't working, isn't paying rent, is eating all her food. He doesn't care that I won't lend him any money, because I will lend
her money to pay his share. He knows I won't let her and my granddaughter loose thier place.
I was going to say I don't know what to do, but it just hit me. I won't lend her money if he is living there, she has to kick him out and get a paying renter. Duh! To give her credit she has made it the last two months on her own without help from me. But that is not good, I guess in a way because now she has no reason to kick him out. She is such a softie she says she is trying to help him! Huh? You are barely able to look after yourself you don't need to help him! He poured on the tears one day, said he wants to get help. He went to a couple of AA meetings, but is back to his old ways. Just enough to get her to feel sorry for him.AAARRRRGGGGHHHH.
Just when I think I can let him go and not worry anymore, he manages to get in my life other ways.
Thanks for listening.......