Originally Posted by
Learn2Live 
Goose gander?
I'm not trying to be mean to you. I'm trying to show you some huge discrepancies in what you report is your thinking and your actions. What you describe does not sound like common sense to me. In my state a restraining order is a criminal complaint of domestic violence that remains on the person's record for life.
80 miles is a long way.
Morning L2L,
Goose gander is the old saying.
It seems from here as though doubting yourself and your actions is okay if you’re the goose but not the gander?
My position regarding divorcing my wife hasn’t changed neither has my love for her and the desire to have a normal family.
In the letter I wrote to my attorney I clearly stated that I was willing to work on the marriage IF she got treatment for alcoholism.
Since I joined SR I have learned that I can’t force her to seek treatment but it’s okay to insist on sobriety prior to any interactions.
BTW, I didn’t throw her and her child out on the street; she is staying with her folks.
And the “carrot” you speak of is nothing new, if requiring sobriety is “setting her up for failure” then I suppose I’m out of line even contemplating opening up a line of communication?